A Way To Start The Day

These days, i felt so unmotivated and dusty like an old shelf. Seems like the adrenaline that i'm injecting myself with is not enough. I've been getting weird emotions lately and its surging inside me like some weird, psychotic songs.

I seriously don't know what to do with this energy where the thoughts involved ran along the line of pushing someone i dislike down the stairs.

But i reckoned too much things going on during day would not be good for my dreams in the night. Two days ago, i dreamed that i fell on the road because of 'something' and cried as if i'm the source of Niagra Falls.

Ph: Hedi Slimane

I seriously can't wait for Chinese New Year. I need to feel safe again and i only get that when i'm with my family.

"And when it lands,

will my eyes be closed

or open?"

Bjork, Hyper Ballad.

Mess Me Up

So many things to do, so little time.

I guess its perfectly fine to be mad with myself?

My room is just as messed up as my life is.

On another note, its becoming into an interactive art by itself. 

If you dig these kind of stuffs.

I'm so tired. i need to sleep yet i have to keep going on... I'm looking forward to holidays... I'm looking forward to Christmas...

"I go through all this,

 before you wake up.

 So i can feel happier,

 to be save up here with you."

 Bjork, Hyperballad.

We're made of dreams?

I'm kind of lazy to write anything here except for the fact that i was FINED for JAYWALKING!

Oh well, every indonesian is born to jaywalk so i guess $20 fine is not as bad as Daion's $200 fine, haha.

Anyway, A.I.A night has been fun, though it take quite sometime for me to loosen up.

Thanks guys, the two of you are like two in the millions who can stand my irritable temper, eccentric behaviour, unneccessary wailings, consistent whining and gag-inducing questions.

A few nights ago, i dreamt that i actually murdered someone.

I can't remember whether i was instructed or forced to do it but i know i was definitely filled with anger. Worse, it was on his wedding day. I carried an axe in my hand, went in front of him and gave him two slashes on his face. I can't see who is it though.

The next thing i know, i was told to murder two more guys and both happened to be on their wedding days as well. I ran away this time round, after realising that i have actually taken someone else lifes.


"I follow with my eyes 'til they crash,
i wonder what my body would sound like,
slamming against those rocks."

Bjork, Hyper Ballad